Detailed plot synopsis reviews of The House by the River |
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Theodora: Theodora lives in a small Greek village filled with goats. Her husband Gerasimos squirts her with five daughters, and then, when he is no longer needed, he conveniently dies. Her bitch daughters get married and run out on her, and Theodora gives them the finger, telling them they'll be back, whimpering, on their knees.
Gerasimos: Sperm donor/husband for Theodora. Once his donations are complete, he dies, as all men in this book do.
Melissanthi: Daughter whose name is bigger than her breasts. She marries an old rich guy who can't get it up. So she bones other guys.
Apostolos: Melissanthi's old rich husband. He can't get an erection, so he arranges for some guy named Angelos to impregnate her.
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Aspasia: Sounds like a muscle disease, doesn't it? Aspasia is another daughter of Theodora.
Stavros: Stavros is Aspasia's husband. But she cheats on him constantly, boning other guys. Finally he leaves her in disgust. I think he's the only man left alive at the end of the book.
Julia: The only daughter with a normal name.
Fokus: Julia's husband. He dies when some black people kill him in Africa.
Evanthia: Fokus's mom. She tries to give Fokus a gypsy potion that prevents him from having boners around Julia.
Polyxeni: Poly becomes an actress. She has no feelings towards men, except Petros.
Petros: Petros is a guy who boned Polyxeni. But when he dumped her, she became a retard.
Magdalini: This daughter moves to America and gets married to a Mafioso. He dies, as all men do in this man hating book.
Franco: Mag's mafia husband. Man=dead.
Charley: Franco's mafia dad. Man=dead.
So many characters! And I have only listed the major ones. You'll never remember even these.
