The Royal We by Heather Cocks Summary Study Guide

Detailed plot synopsis reviews of The Royal We

Plot Summary Part 2

The media follow her everywhere and write about her appearance a lot, opining that her breasts are too small; but Nick has never complained.

Nick tells Bex that his Mom Emma is a mental retard.  Obviously, there must have been a time when she wasn't a retard, when Nick's dad Richard boned her and impregnated her with Nick, because no one would want to impregnate a retard, but Nick is angry that his Mom is retarded and shares this secret with Bex.

After confessing the secret of his retarded Mom, Nick has especially passionate sex with Bex. Mental retardation in others is sexually arousing for this couple.

The press follows Lacey as she gets boned by Freddie and calls her "Racey Lacey" as if she is a slut. Bex is not excited that Lacey has moved to England because her appearances with Freddie have only generated more bad press attention. Bex tells Lacey that she has to break up with Freddie because Lacey's bad press is hurting Bex, somehow. This makes zero sense to me. But Bex agrees to break up with Freddie although it is never quite clear if she does. But it is more than a little selfish of Bex to tell her sister who she can and cannot date.

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Bex gets upset when Nick tells a reporter he has no intention of getting married. She wants his money so bad she can taste it.  They have now been dating for four years and she hasn't yet gotten her payoff.

Nick goes and kisses an old girlfriend named Gemma. He invites her to a wedding instead of Bex, telling her that her public opinion ratings are too low for him to invite her. Bex is like a TV show, she needs good ratings to keep being renewed, heh heh.

Nick blames his retarded Mom for his difficulties. What his retarded Mom has to do with his relationship with Bex, I don't know.

Bex, realizing that she is no closer to becoming royalty by marriage, dumps Nick.

But we all know it is only a tactical move on her part.

Nick immediately goes on vacation with his old girlfriend Gemma, and presumably bones her. Bex, realizing she doesn't have a sex partner, lets her old boyfriend Clive bone her. Then she runs around with a lot of guys and sits on some actor's lap which gets a lot of press attention. The press call her a "nasty tart" and ask her "Where's this weekend's shag, you dirty bird?" Bex is such a slut!

One morning Bex wakes up next to Clive but she was so drunk that she didn't remember getting boned by him. Doesn't Bex have a job or career? Apparently not. Her only job seems to be getting drunk and boned by men.

Meanwhile, Lacey is continuing to get boned by Freddie. It seems the Porter girls both need to constantly feel something moving inside of them.

Bex catches Nick's girlfriend Gemma having her v_gina licked by another girl in a treehouse.

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