Dave Pelzer Message Board

Angelina posts on 11/11/2009 6:13:46 PM I have seen Dave speak and think he is FABULOUS!
Lisa posts on 11/11/2009 11:04:33 AM Why have you no respect for him after seeing him speak?
Angelina posts on 10/21/2009 10:47:45 PM Another great radio show this week Dave - thanks :)

tracy posts on 10/5/2009 1:31:23 AM I live in the U.K. I read Dave's books some 5 years ago. Although his childhood was very damaging and painful I was unable to empathise only to sympathise. Why? Well my childhood was uncannily similar to dave's. I am the youngest of four children and they were not abused by my mother, my eldest brother witnessed some of the abuse and was my saviour back then. One difference between Dave's story and mine is that I am female. My mother physically, mentally & emotionally abused me on a daily basis and as I approach 30 she still tries to do so, it is a game and she draws oxygen from it through a drip. I have difficulty remaining in a lasting relationship because when people become too close panic sets in, what should be understood is that a mother is the one single person who any human should be able to trust and to be played with and manipulated by your mother leaves you unable to trust in ANY other. I do believe that Dave is misunderstood by the majority of society and it would take very exceptional individuals to see beyond his suffering. At the age of 13, I told somebody about how my mother was treating me, that person challenged her. But, my mother convinced them that I was a vindictive child telling stories for attention. To all the people who have posted arguments on this forum, sometimes of a slanderous nature, I'd like to say. A little clarity please, Dave Pelzer told his story to help others to not feel so alone but I suspect he hoped that it would help him more, Dave you will never be completely normal, nor will I. Your mother failed to equip you with the necessary traits to develop naturally. You are a product of your childhood. It outrages me that websites and forums are set up in Dave's name primarily as a tool of self help for others who may have suffered yet so many people are attacking his character. Do those people not realise that they are adding to the abuse, it is nothing short of victimisation on their part and they ought to look within themselves before casting negative stones. Also it is that type of attitude which still exists in society that continues to feed a Dickensian approach to dealing with issues of child abuse. Hypocrites who dare to state they are appalled by child abuse, if a minor were to read their negative take on events in Dave's life I very much doubt that they would be encouraged to speak out and seek help or salvation. Well done to them, perhaps a little less judgment and a lot more understanding in future! Child abuse often resembles carbon monoxide, it can be seemingly undetectable by sight,smell or hearing and works in stealth mode, other senses need to employed to root it out. I hope Dave reads this and would like to tell him good for you, people are just people, there is good and bad everywhere and plenty in-between. I wish you all the best on your journey. We should not question ourselves for the answers we seek, as we cannot answer them, the abuser never answered them and all we are able to do is to try to be comfortable and content with ourselves, and don't forget, material possession and wealth will not make a troubled individual content, you cannot take possessions with you when go. For as long as you have physical good health, you will always be a survivor and a fighter,rely on the strength within and live life by your beliefs.
Angelina posts on 10/4/2009 8:07:02 PM A Child Called It was first published in 1993. That is 18 years ago. Dave Pelzer has not been churning books out in quick succession to cash in. Child abuse as bad as Daves, and even worse, goes on everyday unfortunately. I don't think Daves survival amounts to his books being fiction. Look at the Frizel case for crying out loud. How did that woman and her children survive all those years in the basement? Is that a situation you are going to deny happened as well? If you are not interested in Dave Pelzers book then don't read them. I read Richard Pelzers books also and they back up Daves story. Richard also writes about their mothers abusive behaviour. I don't know Dave Pelzer for a single second.
ANDREW IN CANADA posts on 10/3/2009 11:37:48 AM Whilst I have no doubt Mr. Pelzer suffered at the hands of his parents, his mother's directly and his father's through apathy, I do take issue with some of his writings. Having read and re-read the first two books in his childhood trilogy, I will not be reading the third. I find it somewhat hard to beleive he actually survived, let alone functioned somewhat "normally" if the level of abuse he suffered was in fact real, and not somewhat "memorially embellished". As a member of a family in which there were differing levels of abuse, I know somewhat firsthand how debilitating even minor physical/mental abuse can be. I know I will catch flak (yes, that is the correct way to spell it, there is no "c") for this statement, and Mr. Pelzer, or even his fans, will state "No, what was written in the memoir are the facts, the abuses suffered are real, not embellished or mis-remembered". I can only counter that, if Mr. Pelzer's memory is "oh-so accurate", he must have had some very influential friends, or his foster-father Harold Turnbough may have been an editor for Harpercollins, as he stated in The Lost Boy "...Harold and I seemed to bicker about who was hogging the lamp by the end of the couch, as I tried to read books on self-esteem by Norman Vincent Peale or others on the stranger side, such as Your Erroneous Zones."(pg.s 258-259 in Coming Around in 'Health Communications, Inc. paperback) This does seem odd, as later in the same chapter, he gives a time reference that "By July of 1976".....The oddity?; Wayne Dyer's "Your Erroneous Zones" was not published until August of 1976!....perhaps Mr. Pelzer had gotten an advanved copy? I could (and probably will) go back through the books and will, no doubt, come across many other inconsistencies, in fact, I may actually just read "A Man Named Dave" in the end for just such a reason. It is a know fact that David Pelzer's brothers have questioned the veracity of his memories, and I suggest all of his fans also read his brother Richard's books to get a more even view of things. I do not propose to, or never will, doubt, that all the Pelzers' suffered greatly and needlessly at the hands of a horrible example of a Mother, however, I can not condone the "profitting" from it. I beleive it was Slate Magazine's Editor, David Plotz, who dubbed him "The Child-Abuse Entrepreneur"; kind of an apt title. In fact, and I para-phrase David Pelzer's brother Richard, it would behove us all to donate directly to a charity to end or ease the abuses suffered by many of us in our childhoods, be it monetarily or in time, than ask them to spend tens of thousands to hear someone say "Look how good I turned out despite it all". Actions do speak louder than words, and rather than receiving the cathartic thrill through reading of someone else's life, as real or embellished as it may be, the true measure of "putting it all behind and moving forward" can be found in helping those who were once where you were get to where you are now, no matter how humble those circumstances are.
STAC posts on 9/30/2009 6:07:21 AM I think you guys need to be more productive with your life.. who waste there time coming on a forum just to bag someone? Its pretty sad. everyone has there flaws, not everyone is perfect, yeah he has been there stuff that has problem reflected on who is now and what he does. so what thats him, if you dont like it waste your time on something you like. negitive thinking wont get you anyway. get a life seriously.
Angelina posts on 9/27/2009 8:00:49 PM I loved the latest radio show Dave, keep 'em coming :)
joyce manning posts on 9/25/2009 11:00:42 PM Have seen you speak and have NO respect 4 u!!
Patricia keegans posts on 9/7/2009 9:41:05 PM Read ur books and i have respect 4u thank u
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