Detailed plot synopsis reviews of Crazy Rich Asians |
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Rachel, a Chinese American girl (who was born in China) is being boned by Nick, a Chinese guy from Singapore who is super duper mega mega rich. He's been banging her for two years and decides the time is right for her to meet his family and so they are going to Singapore. Rachel is upset to learn that Nick, in his two years of banging her, has never told his parents about her. She senses something is wrong.
Meanwhile, Astrid, who is Nick's cousin, is being banged by her husband Michael. Boy, these rich Chinese people sure like a lot of sex!
But then there is this confusing line:
"She felt him get hard against the nape of his neck." I couldn't figure out what that means. Was Michael sticking his dick against Astrid's neck? Why?
Click here to see the rest of this reviewThen Michael, tired of HAVING NECK SEX, put his dick in the more traditional place and banged her. Astrid was very happy until she picked up Michael's phone and saw a message from another woman reading "MISS U INSIDE ME", and she realizes that Michael has been banging another woman. We learn this on page 59, but it takes about 300 more pages before she learns anything more.
Back to Rachel. She recalls the time when she first met Nick. Her friend Sylvia accused her not enjoying Chinese p_nis, that she was a self-hating Chinese who only wanted p_nis from the white man. Sylvia claims that Rachel won't meet Nick because he is Chinese and Rachel reluctantly agrees. When Rachel meets Nick, however, she realizes she wants him to bone her.
Back to Astrid. Astrid worries about the text message she saw implying Michael is boning another chick. We get more info on this in about 290 more pages of reading in this fast paced book.
Eleanor is Nick's Mom and she lives in Singapore. When she learns that Nick is bringing Rachel home, she has private investigators check Rachel out. She looks down at Rachel because Rachel is not from a rich family. She thinks Rachel wants to marry Nick for his money.
Back to Astrid. Astrid remembers the first time she met Michael. He was modeling at a fashion show and wearing a tight bathing suit, causing his Chinese p_nis to stick out. Astrid immediately felt that she had to meet this man. It was love at first sight (of his p_nis).
But when she met him, she found Michael to be very boring. But she was still aroused by the memory of his p_nis in the bathing suit. She contacted Michael and offered to come over to his hotel room to have sex with him. What a slut!
But now Michael is squirting into another woman and Astrid isn't in the mood to share.
Meanwhile, Rachel is at a bride's party for Araminta. What? Who's that? Ok, try to follow: Rachel is being boned by Nick. Nick's best friend is Colin. Colin is marrying Araminta. Therefore, for reasons unknown, Rachel is sent to attend Araminta's bridal shower, even though she doesn't know Araminta. Does this make sense to you? No? Good!
Anyway, Rachel goes back to her hotel room to find a dead, bloody fish on her bed with the message "Catch this, you gold digging cunt!" on it.
So, on one level, this is an accusation that Rachel, who is not wealthy, is pursuing Nick because he is wealthy.
